先放放眼下好幾個deadline，忙裡偷閒寫篇日誌吧。

Let me put the several deadlines aside, and write something to relax.


腦袋裡經常會出現一些稀奇古怪的想法，或者也可以叫做靈感。有時候你會感到一種神奇的力量，彷彿點燃了激情。前幾天鄧亞蘭同學看到我改了簽名還在QQ上問我“你在激情夢想乜嘢？”，我說昨天晚上突然有那麼幾秒鐘我發現我沒激情了，覺得學習沒意思，人生沒意思，活着沒意思。。。這是個危險的時刻。據說一個人把謊話重複說100遍連自己都會相信是真的，我只是於此時提醒了自己。

There are often some strange thoughts in my mind. You can call it as inspiration. Sometimes it is like a kind of magic power that light the passion. A few days ago Yalan asked me about my status, “What are you dreaming about?” I said that there maybe one or two seconds at last night I feeling no passion any more. Studying is meaningless; life is meaningless; living is meaningless. This is a dangerous moment. It is said that one man who repeated lies 100 times will believe it as truth. I just reminded myself at the moment.

我在寫字。很久沒有拿筆寫字了，很明顯地發現字體退化了很多。看看以前那些瀟洒激昂的筆跡吧，或許也是思考的間隙。“寄蜉蝣於天地，渺滄海之一粟。”反覆地寫，昔人興感之由，未嘗不臨文嗟悼。

I was writing. It is long time that I have not written so many words with a pen, whose result is that the calligraphy is not as well as before. Look at the cool exciting handwriting of past. Maybe it is time to think it over. “A mayfly in the universe is so tiny, just like a drop in the sea.” Wrote it again and again, I shared the same feelings with ancients, sighing and mourning.

回到激情上來。我想我有一堆例子來描述這樣的時刻。比如2年前的某天在武大的課堂上想起一些什麼，立刻翹課回宿舍整理思路，當時真是滿懷激情，還短信給波波說我有個很好的想法，能賺大錢的那種。可笑的想法。其實當時我已經發現了缺陷，並且嘲笑自己就拿這個改變世界？但你仍抑制不住地懷念那樣一個時刻。

Just go back to the passion. I think I have a bunch of examples to describe such a moment. Just like what happened during a class when I am still WHUer two years ago – I skipped the class and return to the dormitory immediately with passion. I sent SMS to my friend Yang Bo, who was still in that class then and in CAS now, that I have a great idea to make big money. I wanted to realize the great idea together with him. Stupid idea actually. In fact I discovered the defect then. You will change the world just with this? However, I still could not suppress to miss that moment.

Sroan寫過一篇博客《五年之後》，講的是他拿着計劃書見風投。裡面有這麼一段：“manager看完之後，很不淡定地問我：“如果Google進入這個市場，你們打算怎麼辦？”我笑了笑，很淡定告訴他：我們可以把業務都放在中國！”而在此之前，“主管隨便翻了兩頁，很淡定地問我：“如果疼遜也進入這個市場，你們打算怎麼辦？”窗外突然一個晴天霹靂……”這兩段話很有意思。在他改校內狀態“最近突然發現搞個碩士文憑很有必要”時我曾戲謔地回復道“最近突然發現搞個博士文憑很有必要”。這是一部分的真實，你無法判定它的對與錯。我們都是有理想的人，除了在某些時刻會迷失自己。因為我還是會經常感嘆：我還有好多事情要做啊。

There is an article in Sroan’s Blog named Five Years Later, telling a story that he meet VC with his plan. After reading the plan, the manager asked him with worry, “What if Google in?” He smiled and stayed calm, “Then we can keep our business in China!” It is humorous. But wait, “What if Tencent in?” Just like a sudden bolt outside. He changed his status recently, “I find it necessary to get a master degree”. And I replied “I find it necessary to get a PhD”. This is part of the truth which you can not judge it right or wrong. We are all people with dreams, except some moments that I lost myself. It can be proofed. Because I always feel that I still have a lot of things to do in the lifetime.

生命的意義是什麼？答案並不應該是那個古老的悖論——生命的意義就是不斷地探尋到底什麼是生命的意義——聽起來太像文字遊戲了。《華爾街2》裡面有句台詞，“你的數字是多少？你離開華爾街去過理想生活之前想達到的目的？大家都有一個特定的數字，你的是什麼？”的確，我之前也曾想過這個問題。最後你會發現這一切與錢無關，這才是生活。

What is the aim of life? The answer should not be the paradox which sounds like words game too much. There is a dialog in the movie Wall Street Money Never Sleep.

“What is your number?”
“I am sorry?”
“The amount of money you would need to just walk away from it and live.”
“More.”

Actually I also have thought about the number. The truth is that no matter how much money you make, you will never be rich. It is not about the money. It is about the game.

對與錯，這的確是個難於回答的問題。

True or false, That is the question.